Monday, May 8, 2017

I am raising human beings; not a gender.


Boys will be boys they say. I have heard this saying a million times as my five year old yells out BUTTCHEEKS on the public bus. I get it. Boys are always labeled to be more wild ; more outspoken. I used to say those same words all the time; until I had kids and realized gender is not what makes you, you. 

There are so many articles on girls byeing sassy; boys are messy. Let's face it though .... aren't ALL children sassy and unorganized?! I think it has just gone too far. We have allowed society to make our children's personalities - based on their gender. When it shouldn't even matter. We are taught to believe that specific colors are for boys ; others are for girls - and then there's the "neutral" colors. We tell our children that dolls are for girls and cars are for boys. Which is absolutely absurd to me. Your son will grow up to be a father one day ; and your daughter will grow up and own a car one day. So why are we allowing this kind of learning to happen so early. God forbid a girl wants to dress up as a fire fighter and a boy wants to dress up as a ballerina. Both of which are very possible to happen in the real world. 

I absolutely love the ages from birth to 3 years old. They can care less what color shirt they wear. My son will see a pink shirt and think absolutely nothing about it. My five year old however would instantly say something between the lines of "this is a girl shirt" and it's difficult for me. It makes me question my parenting sometimes as I have been trying to stray him away from what we are told to believe when it comes to genders. 

I am raising human beings; GOOD ones at that. Not a gender. I want them to realize that if your a boy or a girl you can do just the same. My five year old loves to cook and bake. He watches dad and I both take turns when it comes to cooking. But we go into a toy store and almost all of the cooking toys are pink or purple; and he thinks twice on getting it. Reminding him that it's just a color - but shouldn't they be made to be used by all children ?! My son has his own favorite colors and cooking toys just don't really accommodate all children. 

I love that both of my boys are still not on that "girls are yucky" phase. I'm hoping they never get to that phase actually. They play with all their friends just as much as the other. But unfortunately as boys get older they are told they are stronger ; faster. So they stop playing with girls and join all boy sports teams.  

I know things are getting better. Better than 20 years ago. But I feel like more people need to realize that they are raising children and stop focusing on gender and it's societal roles. It starts at home. So be very aware of what you tell your kids when they want to get or do something that society tells them isn't for them. 

I am a mother of boys - but most importantly I am a mother of two human beings who will grow up one day and can make a difference in this crazy world we live in. 

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